A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. So next Sunday the priest took the Bishop's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on his door:Sip the vodka, don't gulp. And Lastly, Next Sunday there will be a taffy-pulling contest at St. Peter's, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.