But posting about it online doesn’t give me what I need. These phrases contain good advice in context, especially when they warn us against becoming so dependent on others that we lose a healthy sense of self. Needing others versus being needyWhile the need to relate to others is a psychological need, “neediness” is not a clinical category. Nor are autonomy and relatedness competing psychological needs. Seeking out healthy dependenceA healthy need for connection and relationship allows us to remain ourselves while allowing other people to remain themselves.