How to Do It is Slate’s sex advice column. I desire emotional intimacy, and without it, I’m not sure I even want to have sex. —Horny and InexperiencedDear Horny and Inexperienced,You desire emotional intimacy. What does emotional intimacy mean to you, and what does the amount you want look like in action? AdvertisementOver and over, during my time as a sex advice columnist, I’ve been told by doctors what they are and aren’t able to comment on.