Marcus Aurelius is saying that when something outside you distresses you, the sting is not coming from the thing. The studies below describe patterns across groups of people, which is a different thing from a rule about you or your situation. What “your estimate of it” actually meansStrip away the Roman phrasing and Marcus is drawing a line between an event and your appraisal of that event. The move Marcus describes has a name in emotion research: cognitive reappraisal. Closing thoughtsWhat Marcus got right is that a gap exists between an event and your reaction to it.