In Part 2 of this series, I explored the ways women tend to respond to their partner’s defensiveness and anger. Specifically, I addressed the self-protective but also self-abandoning mechanisms we revert to when we get blindsided by our partner’s reaction to hearing that we were hurt by them. I guess that you’ve explained this experience to your partner a thousand times in a thousand different ways. Remind yourself that the fact that you’re hurt is what matters. You’ve done this, you’ve tried this path, it hasn’t worked, and it’s not your fault.