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A Mostly True History of Marco Rubio
['Christopher Gangemi']
The New Yorker
For a while—like, the first thirty or forty years—being Marco Rubio was somewhat normal.
It’s gotta be Marco Rubio all at once, or kick rocks.
Then, in a steely, strategic move, Marco Rubio used Trump’s schoolyard style against him.
Marco Rubio lost.
Actually, Joe Biden sniffed so much hair that it honestly might not have been Marco Rubio’s wife.