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EN
The men who become gentler after sixty aren’t the ones who mellowed, they’re the ones who quietly gave up three things, the need to be the most competent person in the room, the scorekeeping, and the belief that softness would cost them respect
['Written By', 'Lachlan Brown', 'Lachlan Brown Is A Writer At Silicon Canals Contributing Across The Mind Pillar. His Background Blends Formal Training', 'A Graduate Diploma In Psychological Studies Deakin University', 'With A Long Practice Of Eastern Philosophy', 'Two Decades Of Operating Businesses Scratch. He Writes About High-Performance Routines', 'Decision-Making Under Pressure', 'The Discipline Of Clarity In Technology Work', 'Where The Patterns That Govern Building Also Govern Living. He Splits His Time Between Singapore', 'Ho Chi Minh City.']
Silicon Canals
The gentlest older men I know have not become vague, passive or indifferent.
A 2016 paper reviewed narrative and interview research from 98 earlier studies of older men.
The older man who gives up the need to be the most competent person has not stopped being capable.
Gentleness is not a personality transplant, and it is not an instruction for older men to become harmless so that everybody else can feel comfortable.
I can only notice which older men make people exhale when they sit down, and which habits in myself would prevent me from becoming one of them.