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EN
Psychology says older parents who insist they’re fine when they aren’t aren’t being stoic, they worked out long ago that the honest answer costs one of their children a day off work
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Silicon Canals
An older parent knows what may happen if they mention the dizziness, the leaking pipe or the appointment they cannot reach alone.
That does not mean every older parent is concealing a serious problem, or that saying “fine” is never pride, privacy or genuine reassurance.
Silicon Canals has already examined the broader pattern of older parents who rarely ask their children for anything because asking can feel burdensome.
Researchers conducted 50 semi-structured interviews with adults over 65 and a spouse or adult child about family involvement in care.
In a 2021 qualitative study of adult children supporting older parents, participants described trying to balance safety with autonomy.