My mother is gone, but my father, still going strong in his 90s, is still with us. My father lives too far away to visit my brother and they only rarely talk on the phone. Others are saying we shouldn’t say anything because “it could kill dad.”There is no question my brother will pass before my father. – Sad SisterDEAR SISTER: I’m so sorry for the pain that your brother is experiencing and the pain your family is going through. They don’t know what the future holds, but if your brother is likely to predecease your father, they’re not saving your father from pain by not telling him.