We all have questions and need advice, but sometimes the pseudo therapy in the Instagram stories of astrology girlies doesn’t cut it. This monthly advice column exists to hold space for you and your Boulder queries (especially the uncool ones). I’m pretty sure I got my first and last crystal deodorant from the Alfalfa’s wellness aisle with my employee discount, and I’m also pretty sure that by the end of my shift I smelled approximately like a hypothetical, in-person meet up of r/Boulder subreddit superusers (ayo!). But here’s the thing: You don’t have to date younger guys just because you’re hot and you can. DM @wholefoods_daddy on Instagram or email letters@boulderweekly.com with the subject line “Dear Whole Foods Daddy.”