Among the worst kind is when our thoughtless, selfish kids make friends at the playground, putting us at risk of eye contact or small talk with other children’s parents. But don’t despair, these five tips, The 5 Ps,will help you avoid this excruciating social torture. #1 PhoneYou’re probably doing this one already: talking to an imaginary person on your phone so you don’t have to talk to Aiden and Brayden’s very real parents. It’s remarkable how quickly a playground parent’s interest in chatting evaporates when you pull a well-thumbed bible out of your Jansport. Yes, you could tune out everyone else in the playground by playing with your kid—as a last resort, of course.