EDMONTON – The government of Alberta has declared all citizens must now carry a little picture of Premier Danielle Smith in their wallets. Smith made the announcement this week in front of a giant image of her own face. “I mean, who wouldn’t want to look at THIS all the time?” said Smith, stroking her own reflection in a UCP-branded mirror. Look at that… non-Jewy non-trans word for face.”Smith went on to extol the many virtues of citizens having constant access to her face. At press time, Smith was reportedly also considering having Albertans wear a large red “A” on their clothes.