DEAR ABBY: I am a 38-year-old woman with a 21-year-old daughter, “Penny.” I got pregnant at 16 and was very much alone, with little help from those around me. Her father has since passed away, but he had several other children, and his parents still live in our same small town. I thought my secret (and right to privacy) had been respected, but I recently found out that someone told Penny about her “other family” several years ago. On my daughter’s 21st birthday, her paternal grandma called her and told her she had a birthday gift for her. Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.