DEAR ANNIE: I never imagined I would be writing to you about this, but I’m at a loss and worried sick. Family gatherings feel tense, and I find myself walking on eggshells, afraid that a casual comment will turn into a lecture or argument. I know it isn’t right, but I don’t want to stop. You say you don’t want to stop, and in the same breath you say you know this doesn’t feel right. Being tangled in something you don’t feel good about is harder.