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EN
Tinder Hasn’t Worked, So I’m Putting Myself on Zillow
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McSweeney’s
This is why I’m listing myself on Zillow until I find a good match—which, to my understanding, will be about forty-eight hours.
More than anything, I’m looking forward to finally getting recognition for having good bones.
I’m open to a bit of remodeling, but that needs to be on someone else’s budget.
I’m putting myself up as-is to see whose interest it piques, and frankly, I’m not worried.
All I know is, I’m never again going to accept an offer below asking.